Kaplan (-) Hartnett
I was always jealous of my friends with simple last names.
Their clean and easy names made me wish I wasn’t attached to the
fourteen-letter-plus-hyphen monstrosity agreed upon by my parents before I had
a say in the matter. The Kaplan from
my mom’s side seemed so different from my dad’s Hartnett that I felt like a walking contradiction – how could I be
one person from such vastly different families?
First of all, the two names have contrasting histories. My
mom’s great-grandfather, Rabbi Josef Kapschitz, was a Russian Jewish immigrant
who brought his family to Pittsburgh in 1908. The family decided to change
their name to Kaplan, like so many other Jewish immigrants who wanted more
American-sounding names. My mom’s side of the family is very proud of their
history as Jewish Americans living in the Western diaspora, and Kaplan represents their pride in carrying
on the family heritage. Meanwhile, the name Hartnett
represents the simple American identity of my dad’s family. I think the
name might be from a distant Irish relative, but nobody knows for sure. The
Hartnett side identifies as wholly American, so they are more patriotic than
the Kaplans. While both families are politically engaged and active, the
Hartnetts are explicit in that they critique America because they love their
country and wish to improve it.
Apart from their contrasting histories and identities,
people from my mom’s family and my dad’s family have very different ways of
being in the world. The Kaplans are constantly in action – they get a lot done
but they’re perpetually stressed. Most of them share an intense passion for
academia, though the downside is that they are constantly busy and don’t know
when to slow down. Both families love learning, research, and scholarship, but
the Hartnetts are significantly chiller. They’re very outdoorsy people, which
is why the majority of the family lives in Colorado. The Hartnetts visit
National Parks religiously, love going on road trips, and have way too many
dogs. My mom’s family would not do well hiking a Colorado fourteener at five in
the morning, which happens to be a Hartnett family tradition.
Growing up between both families often makes me wonder who I
identify with most, and sometimes I feel out of place with both families. Because
of these tensions, the most complicated aspect of my name is the hyphen. Sometimes
I experiment with removing the hyphen because I like to feel that I am both
Kaplan and Hartnett, not some strange amalgamation of the two. The hyphen implies
that both names have combined, though realistically the two families are so
different that such a combination seems impossible. I am wholly a part of both
families, though I don’t completely agree with everything they both believe in.
I used to think that I would change my name to something shorter once I was
older, but I’ve come to appreciate how Kaplan-Hartnett represents both family
influences. Still, I often consider changing my last name to Lasagne.
I like how you used your family names (last name) to extrapolate stories and cultures behind them. I especially like your description of the habits and traditions they have passed down over the years. This blog post is very heart-warming on how you learned that rather than being separated from two families, you are essentially what binds them and are a part of both.
ReplyDeleteI like how you talk about the history of the names and how that further complicates your perspective of them. I think the comparison of both name and the people that identify by them is also an interesting idea when you're talking about how YOU feel as someone who has both and feels like they're not completely one or the other.
ReplyDeleteThis is a really interesting take on the hyphenated name. The point of hyphenated names is to bring two things together, to join two different names in a combination like you said. But your experience with where each name comes from and the respective families associated with them couldn't be more different. But it's nice to see that both have grown on you! I think it generally takes people a while to appreciate their family and what has been passed down to them. It's hard because we often see the negative aspects more, since they stand out for their effects. It's very wholesome to read about how you've connected with your family identity.
ReplyDeleteI really enjoyed how you expanded on the history of your surname/surnames to create a greater sense of the contrast you felt. I also loved how you talked not only about their respective histories, but the memories that you associate with them and what they mean to you know. Your descriptions of both creates a great portrait of the way you think about the conflict that you feel. Your dual take on family and relations to you was very interesting.
ReplyDelete